30 degrees

We were out in the cold rain all day harvesting bulbs out of the ground.

Right now we’re at the ranger’s station for wifi.

Trying to get to Portland next weekend.

My life is spent digging bulbs, counting bulbs, hauling bulbs around.

We have a 3 hour commute daily, which we love, because it is the only time we are ever warm.

We woke up this morning to a 30 degree barn. And it’s supposed to get cold this weekend.

A lot has been happening. And then at the same time all I do everyday is work in a field, and then come home and sit around a campfire until I fall asleep in my little sleeping bag up on our loft.

Jess or Carinne wakes me up every morning- and they were joking today, how I never stop smiling. I even wake up smiling.

But fucking hell, it is not a happy morning when you have to get out in a freezing dark barn at 6 am for work.

Having a lot of fun with the campfire though. Good chill conversations every night. We literally have nothing else to do besides sit around and talk. You can’t go to a corner and read- because the corners are cold as fuck. So we all squeeze together on the benches, and sit in light conversation. Sometimes silence.

We eat our dinners around the fire as well, and hold our meetings around the fire.

Everyone has been singing a song to me since I got here. One of the girls on my team heard it, and it caught on really fast. So that half the campus of 300 people were singing it when I walked in the room by the third week.

I won’t mention the name here- because it is quite explicit. I thought it would fade away- but everyone gets a fucking kick out of it still. And we need some laughing up here.

It would be really easy to be pissy the whole time we were here.

We are never warm, we’re doing really hard work, and we have no privacy at all.

But we’re all in it together.

We don’t have internet, we don’t have warmth, we don’t have cell phones. So we all use each other for warmth, conversation and entertainment. It’s the closest to a technologically free environment that I’ve ever lived in.

And everyone here is super chill. The girls on my team- we say it everyday because we are so amazed. We’ve never met a group of girls who are so laid back. And we have so much fun. We’re all going to have biweekly girls weekends. And then we’re probably going to travel the world together after this year. If we can do this together- we can probably do anything together.

Last day of work. Started work at our state park after harvesting all the bulbs at the nursery this week.

The barn is too cold. We are moving out on Wednesday and moving to a lodge with heating.

Going to miss our nightly campfire, but going to be back for Thanksgiving meal/night at our barn.

Hitting a certain tipping point over here in Oregon. Needing some time alone to sort my shit out. Because I can feel that I’m starting to lose focus a bit. Getting distracted with things I didn’t give a shit about two months ago. Things that I didn’t want to have in my life two months ago.

Was talking to my friend Clint last night- and he was saying that when he finishes this year- he thinks he will feel like he can do anything.

I agree.

Just have to do this year, first.

: )


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